When I think about about my past,
in my 20s and early 30s, I was kinda addicted to the flashy.
New York City was the flashiest place of it all. Shows and beautiful girls and rich people and parties. I always had FOMO around there. We all felt like we should be richer, getting promoted faster, doing something cooler.
But while I was occupied with those things, sure, to make money … to fit in … to meet more people … everything just came and went. Jobs came and went. Promotions came and went. Friends came and went. And to be honest, you can just make some money and go see a Broadway show any time. You can go into a fancy restaurant any time. You can go see that fancy building any time.
But those times taking the long train back to my Mom and Felix’s house in Denville, New Jersey from Penn Station. I will never have that back again. Those times we watched television and Game of Thrones together will never come back again. The homemade food that Mom and Felix made for me all the way out in the boondocks was actually more important and valuable than any of the $1000 fanciest meal at Le Bernadin in the middle of Manhattan. The times we shared stories at a dinner table, even though it wasn’t all fun all the time. The times we used that fire pit out in the backyard. I just didn’t know. I am always too late to know.
I can’t get those times back. I wish I had been more present then. The people you love fade away and die and disappear.
And I will, eventually too.
I can’t get those valuable times back. The only thing I can learn, from the past, is … to remember those times fondly and use the love I felt at those moments … to transfer onto you … and others who need love too.
I will think of this Los Angeles time fondly too. And everyone I met. And I loved every single moment, especially the open mics. Even the bad ones made me a better man. I probably would be wasting away in some basement playing videogames and hating on people as an internet troll if I didn’t discover comedy lol