Rambles!!
처음에 이길 것같다가 실수를 해서 큰 코를 다쳤다. 백이였는데 …
삼삼으로 침투 … 그러다가 그 침투진이 전부 잡혔다. 젊은 20대에 내 인생을 망치는 것처럼 …
하지만 마지막까지 포기하지 않았다. 그리고 나머지의 모든 기회들을 살리고 싸워서 기다렸다.
그랬더니 왠일인가. 상대방이 실수를 남발했다. 나한테는 보이는데 상태방이 전혀 볼수없는 쉬운 돌들이 나왔다. 그 기회에 적의 큰 진에 침투하니 그 진의 모든 돌들이 한꺼번에 다 죽었다. 처음에 내 실수로 죽었던 수의 3-4배는 더 큰 이익이었다.
아주 큰 승리였다.
🙂
당신의 인생이 죽고 모든 것이 희망없어 보일때 …포기하지 않고 살아 나간다면 … 반드시 … 해결책 … 구원이 … 기적이 일어난다.
끝까지 포기하지 않기. 모든 승부에서 😉 직장에서. 연애에서.경쟁에서. 운명에서. 꿈의 실현에서.
코비! 1년 반 밖에 양육하지 못해서 미안하구낭 ㅜㅠ
많이 사랑했단다. 지금은 아직 많이 슬프구나.
고맙다. 앞으로는 장난끼와 에너지 많은 너랑 뛰놀면서 항상 같이 있어주는 가족옆에서 자라도록 기도할게.
마이 베스트 프렌드!!
Once upon a time in a mountain, lived a gentle bear. He was full of love and wished the best for all of God’s animals. The Bear didn’t have any family of his own but was strong, hard-working and generosity. The gentle bear was giving and always sharing his fish with other animals. A vulture and a fox ate together with the bear as he brought them all kinds of fishes. But the vulture and the fox kept wanting more and more and got greedy.
The cunning vulture one day said to the bear,
“Bear, I know the secret to becoming human that only takes two years. I will teach you how to become human if you give me a fish everyday for next three months.”
The bear listened and brought the vulture a fish everyday for three months. The vulture ate happily all this free food. But the vulture, at the end of the three months, it demanded even more.
“If you now give me three fishes a day, I will teach you how to become a human in six months.”
The bear had heard enough.
‘I imagine this bird will keep lying to until I feed him the entire ocean.’
It smiled at the bird and said to himself,
“That’s the way that God designed vultures. I cannot change his cunning nature but I showed him the best kindness I can. And I learned my lesson not to trust vultures. And that is enough.”
And the gentle Bear went on his way.
For the next few months, the vulture tricked other animals into doing hard work and lied to them in order to get food and pick up the scraps. But the next time the vulture tried to trick a large animal, he wasn’t so lucky. It was a Panther. When the Panther realized that he had been tricked by the vulture’s lies, it became angry.
“How dare you trick me! I’m one of the fiercest creatures in the jungle. I will teach you a lesson.”
The Panther bit the vulture by the throat and killed him instantly for breakfast.
The Fox wanted to trick the gentle Bear as well. The fox used his cute children to get the Bear’s attention.
“Oh, gentle Bear, I have these six little fox babies to feed but I’ve hurt my leg and cannot hunt. We are hungry, cold and weak. Please share your fishes with us every day for next few weeks.”
The Fox was actually unharmed and capable of hunting but lying to the Bear. But the Bear felt sympathy for the family. The Fox’s children had big eyes and said hello to the Bear whenever He came near. The Bear brought them a fish for every single member of the family every day for months. They ate joyously. After this, the Fox said.
“Oh, gentle Bear. Thank you. Now keep doing this and I will help you. I am smart and have the respect of other big cats, even panthers and tigers. I will help you someday become the king of the mountain but for now, keep feeding us. Keep feeding my babies until they become big and strong. Keep feeding us for the whole next year.”
But the Bear was not stupid. He knew that if he had kept on working and feeding the fishes to the Fox and his family instead of feeding himself for an entire year, he would surely exhaust or starve himself. The Bear saw through the Fox’s greedy nature.
“Oh Fox. I’ve shown you the best kindness I could show, but you still demand more from me. Your needs have no limits. I cannot help anymore. I am too exhausted.”
The Bear then said his goodbyes to the Fox and his children and left. The Fox and its children looked at the Bear with disappointed eyes but the Bear knew that he had to leave them or they would keep taking advantage of his gentle nature.
“I cannot give more kindness than I can afford. I must take care of myself as much as I take care of others. Or others will keep taking from me without leaving anything for my own,” the gentle Bear realized.
A few weeks later, a severe drought hit the mountain. There was no water for days and scarcely any food to be found. Because the thieving Fox had depended on the Bear for food, it had forgotten how to hunt properly and not saved up anything for emergencies. The fox and its children became thin and weak. When a hungry Panther walked by them, they became easy meals for the Panther’s breakfast.
“A bunch of small fox children and their good-for-nothing Dad. I guess it’s better than eating nothing,” the Panther muttered to himself after his meal.
The gentle bear was starving too during the drought and fainted from tiredness in the middle of the mountain. He was thin and weak.
“Oh, I guess this is the end for me,” the Bear said.
“At least I loved everybody as much as I can. Although my friends tricked me, I’ve lived helping friends in need. I regret nothing. ”
The Bear was on the ground panting his last breaths.
That is when he heard the light steps of a human. It was a young woman with long black hair dressed in a white robe and wearing a silver necklace and shiny earrings. She was carrying a satchel and hiking in sandals. Soon behind her, a group of servants came running after her.
“Please be careful, princess. There are wild animals in these mountains.”
The Bear looked up and saw the face of the woman brimming with curiosity and wonder. The Bear licked her hand as she reached down her fingers towards his face. She felt unafraid and smiled at him.
“What an amazing gent bear. I feel bad for him, he is about to die. Let’s bring him food and water.”
The princess asked her servants to bring a huge palanquin that could put the gentle bear inside. When the group made it back to the village with the palanquin, all of the village folks gasped and shouted in wonder and excitement to see a large bear gently and calmly sitting inside a large palanquin for humans. When the Bear arrived at a huge palace garden, the servants laid out fishes, grasses, berries and insects for the Bear for a feast. The Bear gobbled up the feast while the Princess smiled besides him and watched him in delight.
And the Gentle Bear and the Princess became best friends for 10 years to come. When the Bear became old and frail, the Bear died peacefully in his sleep in the Princess’s arms. People all cried for him.
“Let’s remembered him as the hero, the gentle protector of the mountain,” the Princess declared while wiping her eyes.
I’ve always thought this about churches but it’s a peculiar organization filled with … profit-motive and also other motives. It’s very interesting to look deeper into what motivates people to do things the way they do there. Some people go to church to look for spiritual guidance. Some to find company to relieve their loneliness. Some to find meaning. It seems like they use a variety of techniques to get people to pay up money and supporting churches. ‘Feigning a certain type of brand image’ seems to be one of them. To pretend like they are doing a lot for the community … might be an example as well.
[5:54 PM]I have always been disappointed. It never had to be that way. Whether it’s a cult that extorts money from people promising them some spiritual awakening, or even corrupt christian churches, the leaders of those organizations seem to care very little for the followers and the people in pain who actually need help. instead, they make a living off of taking advantage of those people, convincing them A is right, or they need to do B. Or even worse, they might even pretend to be “spiritual authority” … and then just fool people into following them as spiritual leaders.
At an ideal church, or just a group that helps each other … there would be no donation necessary or money-motive whatsoever. Almost like a free-forming “meetup” group that’s open to everyone, we could just come together from all walks of life and celebrate God, spirituality, values and morality and how to strengthen ourselves spiritually.
I guess that’s too much to ask in today’s day and age of money-hungry people.
I pray that God gives us true guidance, the wisdom to tell apart the corrupted from the innocent. So that next generations will be wiser than the one currently living now. We need true churches that cares about its brothers and sisters.
I started thinking today … that maybe … in this world full of power-grabbers, backstabbers, people willing to do anything to show off and assert their dominance over other people … (it must have been like that back then too) … and cause strife, conflict, power struggles and unnecessary anger …
The one who lives for their fellow brothers and sisters is the one that KNOWS that other people naturally try to do this. That all human beings have a tendency to want to feel powerful / popular … that nobody wants to feel weak, unimportant and irrelevant.
And so he/she adjusts his attitude in this crowd of fighting people. He can be the meek one. She can be the humble one. Blessed are the peacemakers for they shall be called the Children of God. He/she picks the narrow path. Undeniably the harder path, the hardest path … is to realize that other people have this natural tendency to assert dominance and fight for dominance … and to understand that and to move forward without contributing to that chaos.
Being a peacemaker in this situation, cannot be considered “weak” but instead wise … and aligned with the Spirit of God in the big picture … fighting for dominance between each other is such a small deal in the big scheme of life.
To create the world that God envisions in this world, it is perhaps the willingness to be humble, to seem meek, and in a lowly position that will create harmony between all the men and women. On the contrary, perhaps it is the tendency for certain people to show off, brag, to want to seem powerful and in a high important position … that causes unnecessary strife and disharmony.
2 And he opened his mouth and taught them, saying:
3 “Blessed are the humble in spirit, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
4 “Blessed are those who mourn, for they shall be comforted.
5 “Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit the earth.
6 “Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be satisfied.
7 “Blessed are the merciful, for they shall receive mercy.
8 “Blessed are the pure in heart, for they shall see God.
9 “Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called sons[a] of God.
10 “Blessed are those who are persecuted for righteousness’ sake, for theirs is the kingdom of heaven.
11 “Blessed are you when others revile you and persecute you and utter all kinds of evil against you falsely on my account. 12 Rejoice and be glad, for your reward is great in heaven, for so they persecuted the prophets who were before you.
I’ve realized recently that books are a real amazing way for us to get on the same brain wavelength as some of the greatest minds that have ever evolved and lived in this world. Autobiographies are especially great but fiction writers are just as good.
As we tap into their consciousness, we can glean and absorb all sorts of (not just knowledge) … spiritual consciousness. Their love. Even their passions. Their interests. Their unique sense of humor. Their tastes. Their left brain and right brain. The way they say things is a real great way for us to learn to be like them, think like them. The way they order phrases and sentences, even, is a huge boon for our mind. I guess that’s why we always love quotes from famous people as well. Things that buddha said, jesus said, albert einstein etc … we get a glimpse into the extraordinary brain wave that existed when they were alive.
I’ve been realizing that good writing cannot come from a “bad” consciousness. Meaning unless he/she works on themselves mentally, physically, spiritually, good writing just cannot (it is impossible) to be born that actually touches people in a major way. I feel that I’ve tried myself. When I drink too much alcohol or don’t take care of myself, or am lacking discipline in some area of my life, it shows in my writing. It’s not as fluid, not as strong. I can’t get a grip on what I’m trying to say. But when I have a good handle on my spiritual life, it really just flows, I believe, from the Spirit.
Perhaps same with voice, speaking voice, singing voice. Usually a voice, and the power that comes from a voice, is a reflection of their inner strength and spirit as well …
P.S.
Elon Musk better keep working on NeuraLink … so that we can eventually “download” and “upload” brains into our collective internet! 🙂 that would be cool.
my fav song! lyrics are beautiful.
How high does the sycamore grow
if you cut it down, you will never know.
we need to sing with all the voices of the mountain.
we need to paint with all the colors of the wind.
whether we are white or copper-skinned
you can own the earth and still
all you will own is earth until
you can paint with the colors
of the wind
나이가 어렸을 때는 별로 누구를 가르치고 싶다거나 지도하고 싶은 마음이 전혀 없었다.
나도 이제 청년이라고 하기에는 너무 나이가 높아지고 있지만 그래도 청년들에게 영향을 끼치고 어떤 특정된 방향으로 지도하려고 하는 나이든 사람들을 보면 약간 비판적인 생각이 많이 든다. (현재의 40대, 50대, 60대 사람들). 너무 강요를 해서 부담스러울 때가 많다. 근거가 별로 없다. 자기의 행동이나 어려운 일을 성취함으로서 롤모델이 되려는 생각을 하지도 않는다. 그냥 쉽게쉽게 말로만 처리하려고 한다. “이렇게 해라.” “저렇게 해라.” “진리란 이것이다.” “자기를 따르라” 고 말만 하지 정당한 이유를 말하지는 않는다.
정말 동등한 시점에서 설명해주었으면 좋겠다. 내가 왜 그렇게 해야되냐. 윗사람이 아랫사람에게 이야기하는 태도가 아니라 (꼰대질은 쉽게 질린다) 그걸 설명해주는 일이 그렇게 어려울까? 아마도 정당한 이유가 없고 “내가 그렇게 믿으니까 너도 그렇게 믿어라” 라는 터무니없고 비합리적인 생각을 강요하려고 하니까 설명하기가 힘들 것이다.
어떤 사회적 위치에서 정당한 이유로 존경이나 존망을 받지 못하는 사람일수록 더 꼰대질에 고집한다. “내가 나이가 많으니까 너는 나의 말에 순종하고 내가 더 잘 안다.” 무슨 말도 안되는 소리인가? 제갈량은 유비보다 20살은 더 어렸다. 요즘에 entrepreneurship 과 innovation 을 담당하는 선구자들은 젊은 사람들이다.
나도 책을 쓸 때나 다른 사람들앞에서 무언가 이야기를 나누어야될 나이가 되면 이런 식의 강요를 하기는 싫다. 두번째 쓴 책에서도 약간 너무 꼰대질이 아니냐고 하는 편집자의 말에 약간 충격이었다. 아마도 자기중심적으로 내가 믿는 것만 너무 고집해서 그런 것일수도 있다.
정말 내 자신이 배우고 싶고 존경하는 롤모델들은 말을 그럴싸하게 하는 사람들이 아니다. 오히려 나랑 말을 그렇게 말을 한 적이 없거나 아예 그냥 한번도 만난 적이 없는 사람들이 가장 큰 우상이 된다. 그 사람들이 행동을 통해서 보여준다. 말은 적게 하고 행동으로 보이는 사람들이다. 용기. 성숙함. 진리. 지혜. 인덕.
누구를 가르치고 지도하고 싶지는 않다. 나이가 들면 다 비슷하게 내가 깨달았던 것들을 다 깨달을 것이다. 하지만 나의 작품이나 행실을 통해 용기/기쁨을 얻는 사람들이 있었으면 좋겠다.
만약에 하나 라도 제대로 말하고 싶은 것이 있다면 … 자기자신을 믿고. 어려울 때 포기하지 말고. 자기의 꿈을 버리지 말고. 타인의 시선 신경쓰지 않고 전력을 다해서 모든 일에 도전해 보아라. 그것이 아닐까.
Carpe Diem 하라고. 그리고 나같이 늙어 가는 사람들을 초월하라고. 부모님이 하라는 대로, 나이든 사람이 하라는 대로. 상사가 하라는 대로가 모든 것이 아니라. 다음의 세대는 그 전의 세대를 초월해야 된다고. 꼰대질하는 사람들 별로 신경쓰지 않고 자기만의 철학을 믿을지라도 “진리” 를 쫒아가라고. 진리가 승리라고.
한국도 점점 그런 사회가 되었으면 좋겠다.
진정한 리더는 타인, 하인, 부하에게 권세, 나이, 지위나 우월을 내세워서 이래라 저래라 명령하는 사람을 말하는 것이 아니다. 그것은 이기적인 꼰대질, 강요뿐이다. 자기의 의지대로 하지 않는다고 아랫사람을 구박하고 소리지르고 화를 낸다면 그것은 벌써 리더십이 없음을 이야기한다.
I believe a true leader is not somebody who uses their position, authority, some form of superiority or power to order people around to do their bidding.
진정한 리더는 다른 사람들에게 구지 자신의 우월함을 설명하거나 증명하지 않아도 벌써 다른 사람들이 그 사람을 추종하고 존경하게 되어있다. 진정한 리더는 벌써 그 타인과의 교류가 있기 전에 오래전에 리더의 인격을 갖춘 사람이다.
A true leader does not have to prove their superiority or explain it even with words. Other people will already have respected and followed that person. A true leader is already a leader before interacting with those below him/her. He/She has already acquired the virtues necessary to become such a leader through years of dedication.
그리고 상대방을 위해서 희생을 할 마음가짐, 충분히 이해하려는 마음가짐이 있고 그런 따뜻하고 인자한 마음을 가짐과 동시에 강한 힘을 가진 사람이다. 그 상대방 (부하, 하인, 아랫사람, 후배) 을 어떤 방면에서 진심으로 발전시킬 수 있는 능력과 마음씨를 가진 사람. 능력이 별볼일없는 착한 사람은 리더가 아니다. 능력은 엄청 출중한데 다른 사람을 위해서 헌신하지 않는 사람도 리더가 아니다.
A true leader must also have strength and fortitude but also the servant-leader mindset, the warmth & willingness to help and understand his/her fellows. Both the ability and the kindness to improve those below him/her in one aspect or another. A nice guy without much strength is not much of a leader. A hot-shot who can do everything but a complete selfish asshole is also a terrible leader.
진정한 리더는 모두를 위해서, 세상을 위해서 분발하고 노력하고 희생하고 본보기 role model by example 이 되어서 주변사람들을 inspire 하고 그 행동으로 다른 사람들에게 도움이 되는 사람이다. 다른 사람들이 자기혼자서 쉽게 이루어내지 못하는 일들을 리더같은 인물이 코치, pioneer, 치어리더, 멘토, 선배, 목사, 선구자가 되어서 이루게 도와주고 어떻게 하는지 용감하게 먼저 보여주는 것. 아무리 힘들어도 포기하지 않고. 일생안에서는 그 보답, 보상으로 아무것도 기대하지 않은 체. 예수처럼. 부처처럼. 간디처럼. MLK 처럼. JFK 처럼. Bruce. Steve Jobs. Bill Hicks. Tesla. Einstein. 김대중씨. 다들 그렇게 살다가 죽었다.
A true leader works hard every single day and dedicates himself/herself for the good of the world and those around him/her. They lead by example, inspire and help those around them through action. In regards to great feats and challenges that cannot be easily accomplished, these leaders act as coaches, pioneers, mentors, trailblazers and shepherds and show us the possibility of how it can be done by acting with courage, initiating something new. No matter how tough it is, without expecting any reward in return. They all lived like that and died.
Dictatorial 한 insecure 리더들은 타인의 의견을 받아들이지 못하고 자기의 의지대로만 타인 위에 서서 명령하려고 들지만 (“My way or highway!”),
현명한 리더는 모두의 의견을 호기심가지고 듣고, 아무리 어리거나 낮은 사람도 자기자신의 의견을 가질 권리가 있다는 것을 존경하고 인정하고.
열린 마음을 가지고 듣고, 넓은 마음으로 포옹하고,
자기자신이 틀렸다고 증명되면 과감하게 겸손하게 인정하고 사과하고. 오히려 자기자신을 수정해주고 고쳐주는 사람들을 격려하고 고마워하는 사람이다.
An insecure dictator cannot accept the opinions of others or advice of those around him, instead just tries to steamroll others into submission to make himself/herself feel powerful and better. “Do this or do that or you are fired. My way or the high way.”
A wise leader is the opposite. They listen to all with curiosity. No matter how young or lowly or humble that other person seems to be. He/she respects and honors everyone’s right to have an opinion and express it. They listen with open mind, a warm, understanding mind.
And when it turns out that you were wrong, proven wrong, it is more the occasion to be a leader, more occasion, BEST OCCASION to stand tall and communicate. “I was wrong.” Admit it and apologize humbly and loudly. It is the BEST time to lead by example.
Instead, thank those who correct you and on the contrary, encourage them to keep doing that. “Whew, I was going off the rails! Thanks so much! 😉 ” A leader makes mistakes just the same.
그것의 나의 작은 의견입니다.
그리고 이런 리더십의 자질 이 세상 모든 형제 자매 분들안에 잠재하고 있다는 것. 주님께서 알맞은 시간에 그 잠재력을 깨워주시리라 믿습니다.
And this Spirit lives and sleeps inside all of you brothers and sisters. And at the appropriate time, God will awaken it so that we can will and act according to God’s good purpose. He awakens the leader in every single one of us!!
CARPE DIEM
The body is a temporarily loaned domicile that houses a Spirit. Once you are able to cleanse and awaken the Spirit with the help of God (and others aka mentors/partners), you become one with the stream of pure consciousness with the universe.
Then you are able to listen to God’s desires for you and act accordingly based on his inspiration, energy and grace and achieve superhuman feats in this world as did many greats who came before us.
All the nameless human beings who used to house this world have been easily turned to dust and forgotten. They ate, slept, mated, and did whatever human beings have been doing since the evolution of apes and then became one with the soil again. It it inevitable, quite necessary for this to happen.
The only ones that remain in the collective consciousness of our history are deservingly the ones who gave up their selfish life for the good of many and pushed forward the level of our existence.
Once we die, it is “time’s up”. We must do all that is possible before the time is up, with the temporary bodies and the genetic potential we are given at that moment in time.
And then we die. And the cycle continues. With every iteration of the human species, there’s people who awaken themselves and sacrifice their lives in order to push human evolution forward. It is our grave responsibility to set aside our selfish desires, achieve pure consciousness and live our lives dedicated to the service of many.
The concept of “eternal life” might have been more or less a metaphor – where the key to immortality is living a life worth living. If you cleanse your Spirit and achieve the consciousness at the highest level, then you become one, unified and joined with divine universal wisdom. At that point, you cease being just you, whether you are John or Ethan or Tom or Anthony or Kathleen or Jennifer. You start living life as one servant of the Universe, dedicated to the good of all beings on this universe. At that stage, you serve the world as best as you can, and inevitably you die. At the end of that journey, it ceases to matter whether you lived 40 years or 80 years or eternally. As long as the Spirit exists, to help the world, to love all your brothers and sisters, to give up your selfish desires for the good of many … as long as that consciousness keeps flowing and it will as long as the Spirit/Universe/God exist …. then it wouldn’t matter that Terry or Katie or Sunny or Olivia are now dead and separated from their body.
We live in each other’s collective consciousness, and we live fo each other until the End of time. Until the end of time. The Spirit never dies. Nor the collective wisdom of our past. The ones who gave their lives for this iteration and the next – those we thank, and then we pay it forward.
And the cycle continues!
(I hope in the next iteration, we are living with much more abundant love, acceptance, wisdom, compassion and patience in our hearts! Carpe Diem)
P.S.
To die a glorious death for the service of many is much better than having lived out your human life-span over 90 years and dying painfully of some natural cause or cancer. What good would it be for me to take up more food as a dying old man.
P.S2
Don’t leave any regrets! 🙂 We are going to die anyways. And that’s kinda liberating.