Extended fasting makes me different every time

Filled with ideas and motivation for action. Trying new things. More intellectual curiosity. More joy in life. Wanting to move. Appreciation for music and sound. I see things and understand more clearly. I process things at like 1.5x usual speed … I move slower though because my muscle strength is not completely back but my mind is super active. Calm and active, not busy.

I can taste the subtlest sweetness in asparagus, broccoli, tomatoes … I ate a whole tomato like a fruit yesterday.

so strange. The next 30 days, I’m just going to do keto diet and not water fasting but I hope some of those ketosis brain benefits continue. I hope I don’t ruin it this time. All thanks be to God.

The Future of Comedy with possibilities to incorporate AI or Machine Learning

In the future, can AI be used to create or understand laughter? Can it be an impartial, objective entity to judge a joke’s value? Theoretically speaking, this is possible now through machine learning.

In simpler terms, we could start training a machine learning model that will get fed all the jokes told by past comedians that we know to be “great”. Ultimately, we could devise an AI that learns how to laugh at good jokes or understand bad jokes … or even attempt to creates jokes … kinda like Eve from Wall-E who understands humor.

Two types of input data:

  • First is joke textual data, meaning jokes written out in plain text.
  • Second is auditory or video data, meaning jokes told to an audience and analyzed through audio recordings or video recordings.

(Another possible input data type is number of recommendations from other proven, successful comedians. Kinda like Google’s “Backlink” mechanism that adds validity to a website based on how many links it’s getting from other websites, those recommendations will add validity to the fact that something is a good joke, although I put this as just an option because any human element in this algorithm has the chance of being manipulated through favoritism or nepotism)

So in simple terms, we could start training a machine learning model that will get fed all the jokes told by past comedians that we know to be “great”. We need to write these out in plain text, word for word.

Once we do that, we have an AI that can see a sentence in text form and try to deduce if it looks like a good joke or not, hopefully with 80-90%+ accuracy. We could potentially add other labels on the joke like “outdated” meaning it could have been a good joke that worked in Pryor’s time but likely won’t work today. Or labels like “potentially offensive toward LGBTQ” or “potentially offensive toward Latinos”. This would be possible through a well-trained model … theoretically. And then once we feed in YOUR joke, it will run its trained algorithm and say “Hmm, this joke is potentially offensive toward that race with about 30% chance but could be very funny with about 85% accuracy.”

Also, jokes are not just textual words. So audio analysis or video analysis will help immensely with this machine learning model. But since video files are so large in size, it would be difficult to try to add video in from the beginning. So we could stick to audio recordings to start.

Based on laughter feedback from audiences captured inside the audio recordings, especially at real shows, once we feed that into the machine learning model, it will get good feedback that “okay, so that joke is funny,” but also “okay, if you tell that joke in this manner, it doesn’t work that well but if you add intonation and say this part louder, then this joke is funny.” An audio data expert/engineer would be able to help us determine what is actually possible to calculate through audio data or not. At the least, after feeding this ML model like 5,000 to 10,000+ audio recordings, we would be able to deduce the general formula, the general sound pattern of what a joke sounds like. So at least this model will know, “oh, man, that sounds like a great joke.”

Theoretically, after this AI is fairly accurate and complete, the next possible sophistication could be to do take in the entire “set” of a comedian’s act. Instead of judging comedians by individual jokes alone, how did he/she arrange the jokes? What was the overall reception at the end of this set? Does this person’s set model a great comedian’s set arc/set order pattern? So Jane could have told 1. A+ joke 2. C- Joke 3. B joke, and instead of just totaling up those jokes and averaging them out, and saying Jane is kind of a B-level comedian, you could feed the ML entire sets like 100 of recordings to help it determine “okay, well Jane did badly that night but overall speaking with 95% accuracy, Jane is an A-level comedian.”


One easy MVP (minimal viable product) of this idea could be a “Funny or Not” app. Basically akin to the app “Hotdog or Not Hot Dog” invented by the character Jian Yang played by Jimmy Yang on Silicon Valley, At the very least, it could offer guidance to beginner comics that a joke you are trying to do is unnecessarily long, or racist, or problematic, or unclear, or too derivative of some other joke in the past.

Fasting realizations

Extended fasting is helping me yet again to cleanse my mind and look at different parts of myself. Last time, it was inspiring me to move to LA and pursue comedy once again which turned out to be literally the best decision in my life. This time, I think it’s telling me something a little different. 

Lust and Gluttony are two aspects of an overactive animalistic human brain stemming from our evolutionary ancestors. If we let that part of our brain take hold of us, it becomes so big to the point where all you wanna do is focus on porn, sex and food … just like gorillas in the zoo who were fed white bread by their zookeepers and all they wanna do afterwards is to masturbate and mate, and for sure, end up dying early. Reproduction is a very taxing activity for both the male and the female.

I wouldn’t be surprised if there were manipulative devils all over the world. Those who flaunt their sex appeal for attention and money on social media are essentially doing the devil’s work. As well as men like Jeffrey Epstein who sell little girls for the pleasure of old men with money . They are devil incarnate. Not just sexual lust but people who prey on the brain’s certain animalistic urges and aggravate them in order to … make profit or take advantage of other human beings. Essentially food marketing/advertising/commercials of McDonald’s or Popeyes seek to do that on TV by highlighting how good their item is and how good it will taste. Fitness programs and health products advertising do the same by trying to convince you to eat a particular vitamin or superfood. They try to convince you that they can make you fitter, sexier, stronger, smarter or more attractive. But that burger is never as good once you finish eating it. And that superfood doesn’t really make you smarter or fitter overnight.

Vanity, Gluttony, Pride, Sloth, Lust … these are the sin triggers that devils use to manipulate humans into their snare. The ways that angels use to win people over are love, humility, selflessness, joy, patience, kindness, discipline, compassion, forgiveness, temperance, diligence and modesty … which persevere over darkness every time.

I see different aspects of goodness and evil present in people closest to me, which is sometimes painful to see. You would want your best friend and family members to only embody the good qualities, but that’s the opposite of truth. 

My message for today is we must not let other people from discouraging us or even rub off on us while we are trying to better ourselves. It is easier said than done. Some people’s influence on you can be extremely positive and beneficial, while some people (and to be honest, most people) can influence you in extremely discouraging and negative ways. My entire life, I was confused about this, whom to let inside my mind and my heart, and whom to protect myself against them. It was way too open and vulnerable. But now I think it’s becoming clearer and clearer, that despite the love I have for both my family and friends, I must be the most receptive to the energy I receive from God, and protect myself from everything else. 

일어나서 달려라

“그만 둬! 포기하라구! 넌 이미 졌어? 

  사람들이 소리치면서 만류한다.

  “지금은 모든 것이 네게 불리하게 돌아가고 있어. 이번엔 아무리 해도 성공할 

수 없다구? 

  그래서 내가 실패의 그림자 앞에 고개를 떨구고 어깨가 축 처질 때마다 나는

  어떤 달리기 시합에 대한 기억으로 다시 기운을 얻곤 한다.

  그 장면을 회상할 때마다 희망이 다시금 내 약해진 의지를 일으켜 세운다.

  왜냐하면 그 단거리 경주를 생각하는 것만으로도 내 영혼이 도로 생명력을 

얻기 때문이다.

  어린 남학생들의 달리기 시합이었다.

  아직도 얼마나 생생히 그 순간이 기억나는지 흥분감과 자신감, 하지만 역시 

두려운 마음도 있었다.

  뭐라고 말하기 어려운 기분이었다.

  선수들 모두가 흥분된 마음으로 출발선에 섰다.

  운동장 양쪽에선 아버지들이 자신의 아들들을 응원하고 있었다.

  소년들은 저마다 아버지에게 자신이 일등 하는 모습을 보여 주고 싶었다.

  드디어 출발 신호가 울리고 선수들은 앞으로 달려나갔다.

  건강한 가슴과 희망들이 불타올랐다.

  우승자가 되고 그래서 그날의 영웅이 되는 것이 소년들 저마다의 바램이었다.

  특히 한 소년이 있었다.

  소년의 아버지 역시 군중 속에서 지켜보고 있었다.

  소년은 선두로 달려나가면서 생각했다.

  “아빠가 자랑스러워 하실 거야.”

  그런데 속도를 내어 약간 내리막 진 운동장을 지나 얕은 웅덩이를 뛰어넘는 

순간 우승자가 되리라고 생각했던 어린 소년은 그만 발을 헛디뎌 미끄러졌다.

  중심을 잡으려고 노력하다가 소년은 그만 두 팔을 헛 짚으며 바닥에 얼굴을 

문지르고 말았다.

  관중들의 터져나오는 웃음 속에서 그렇게 그는 자빠졌고 희망도 사라졌다.

  이제 그는 우승자가 될 수 없었다. 창피한 나머지 그는 어떻게든 그 자리에서 

달아나고 싶었다.

  하지만 소년이 넘어지는 순간 그의 아버지가 확신에 찬 얼굴로 일어섰다.

  그 얼굴은 소년에게 분명한 목소리로 말하고 있었다.

  “일어나서 달려라 

  소년은 벌떡 일어났다. 다친 데는 없었다. 조금 뒤쳐진 것뿐, 그게 전부였다.

  그는 뒤쳐진 것을 따라잡기 위해 온 마음을 다해 달렸다. 얼른 다른 아이들을 

따라잡아 우승자가 되겠다는 생각이 너무 강한 나머지 마음이 다리보다 더 빨리 


  그래서 그는 또다시 넘어지고 말았다.

  아까 포기했더라면 한번밖에 창피를 당하지 않았을 것이라고 소년은 생각했다.

  “난 이제 달리기 선수로선 희망이 없어. 다신 경주에 참가하지 말아야 해.”

  하지만 군중의 웃음소리 속에서 소년은 아버지의 얼굴을 발견했다.

  그 확신에 찬 얼굴이 다시 말하고 있었다.

  “일어나서 어서 달려라 

  그래서 소년은 또다시 벌떡 일어났다.

  맨 꼴찌에서 달리는 아이보다 열 걸음 정도 뒤쳐져 있었다.

  소년은 생각했다.

  “저 거리를 메꾸려면 정말 빨리 달려야 하겠어”

  온 힘을 다해 달린 끝에 소년은 금방 그 거리를 따라잡았다.

  하지만 선두까지도 따라잡으려고 애쓴 나머지 또다시 미끄러져 넘어지고 


  난 졌어! 소년은 그곳에 엎어져 있었다.

  눈물이 볼을 타고 흘러내렸다.

  “이대로 계속 달리는 건 무의미해.세번이나 스트라이크를 먹었으니 아웃이야.

  다시 시도한다는건쓸데 없는 짓이야. 

  일어나고픈 의지가 사라지고 모든 희망이 달아났다.

  너무 뒤쳐졌고, 너무 실수 투성이다.어쨌든 패배자가 되었다.

  그는 생각했다.

  “난 졌어. 앞으로도 창피함을 안고 살아가게 될 거야.”

  하지만 그때 소년은 곧 마주칠 아버지의 얼굴을 생각했다.


  낮게 메아리치는 소리가 들렸다.

  “일어나서 네 책임을 다해라. 넌 여기서 포기해선 안 돼. 

  일어나서 어서 달려라.

  그 목소리는 소년에게 새로운 의지를 심어 주고 있었다.

  “일어나라 넌 결코 패배하지 않았어. 

  승리한다는 것은 다른 게 아니야.

  넘어질 때마다 일어나는 것이 진정한 승리이지.”

  그래서 소년은 또다시 일어났다. 이기든 지든 최소한 중단하진 않겠다고

  소년은 새롭게 결심했다. 이제 다른 아이들에 비해 너무 뒤쳐져 있었다.

  여태껏 이렇게 뒤쳐져 본 적이 없었다. 그래도 그는 자신이 갖고 있는 온 힘을 

다해 마치 우승을 노리는 사람처럼 달렸다.

  세번이나 그는 넘어졌지만 세번 모두 일어났다.

  우승의 희망을 갖기에는 너무 뒤쳐져 있었으나 그래도 끝까지 달렸다.

  우승자가 결승선을 통과하는 순간 관중은 환호의 박수를 보냈다.

  일등을 한 선수는 자랑스럽게 고개를 쳐들고 행복한 미소를 지었다.

  넘어지지도 않았고 창피를 당하지도 않았다. 하지만 세번이나 넘어졌던 소년이

  맨 꼴찌로 결승선에 들어서는 순간 관중은 일제히 일어서 더 큰 환호를 


  달리기를 끝까지 해낸 것에 대해.

  소년이 비록 고개를 숙이고 자신감을 잃은 채 마지막으로 들어오긴 했지만

  관중의 박수 소리로 따지면 소년이 곧 우승자였다.

  아버지에게로 다가간 소년은 풀이 죽어서 말했다.

  “잘 해내지 못해 죄송해요.” 소년의 아버지가 말했다.

  “나한테는 네가 우승자다.넌 넘어질 때마다 일어났어.”

  불행하고 힘든 시기가 인생에 닥쳐올 때 그것을 견딜힘조차 없을 때

  그 어린 소년에 대한 기억이 나의 달리기를 도와준다.

  왜냐하면 인생 전체는 그런 달리기와 같은 것이니까 오르막이 있고 내리막이 

있는 것.

  그리고 그 길 위에서 당신이 해야 할 일은 넘어질 때마다 일어나는 것.

  “그만 중단해 ! 포기하라구! 넌 이미 졌어 

  사람들은 아직도 내 얼굴에 대고 소리친다.

  하지만 내 안의 또 다른 목소리는 말한다.

  “일어나 어서 달려라 

  작자 미상

Today’s comic is a modern-day monk

Today’s standup comic is essentially an artistic monk dedicating his/her life to mastering the craft of standup comedy and all the self-development that comes along with it, often at the expense of a comfortable lifestyle usually pursued by non-comics of the outside world. During his/her artistic evolution, he/she usually struggles under complete obscurity for an extended amount of time and must not lose faith despite their general inability to accumulate wealth, to date/marry successfully or to achieve fame, status, and success in their early years. It requires nothing less than complete dedication and sacrifice for the craft. Blood, sweat and tears. The kind in which those who have never attempted it will never fully understand.

Patrick M advice for you to be a successful champion

You have to fall in love with the process of becoming better and better. The journey is everything. 

Everybody who has succeeded in life will tell you they failed 100 times.

In france and korea, etc other cultures, people feel failure is deemed as end of the world.

Failure means nothing. Failure is just getting information about not getting what you wanted at certain point. It’s GREAT feedback. There’s just next steps.

There’s 1000 failures before you can get to that step where you are achieving at the highest level.

When you fail, you feel lost. 

You might be failing and losing at something, but you actually might be 1 inch away from the destination you wanted to get to.

So that temporary feeling of failure … it’s just a feeling.

It doesn’t correspond to anything real. It’s just one moment in time where you are not where you wanted to be.

Every mistake just depends on how you look at it.

  • Just look at it … like now I know much better how to do, what to do to direct myself toward what I want. 

Everything in life depends on your perspective on it.

  • If you look at it through one camera, you see fail and disaster.
  • But if you look at it through another camera, you get a lot of feedback. I’m not where I wanna be yet … but with this feedback I can direct it where I wanna go.

If you can think like this, you will def become a success, you are on the way to your dreams.

You can’t be happy being stationary, staying same level. 

People at age 40, 50 starting tennis and they wanna be better.

That is life.

Life is exciting because you are developing yourself in what you like to do, and become better.

Happiness is in the process of growing.

These Images of a nice life. Nice car, nice wife, nice family, nice house. You talk to them, you will be surprised many aren’t happy. 

  • Unless they are really focused and developing themselves every day.

All the positive experiences you’ve had in life BUILDS your confidence.

If every day you win and get positive feedback … you end up thinking … Damn I rock. I am really good at that.

And more confidence you get and go out there again, better and better you get.

A failure is just feedback. So it doesn’t hurt you anymore.

If you don’t have confidence, a failure might hurt you and destroy your confidence.

A “feel” about your abilities … is very important.

  • When athletes have formed a lot of negative strong beliefs about themselves, they have a hard time coming back to winner mentality
  • They need to resolve that in order to become winners again.

Every time a tennis player loses, Patrick asks him

“Next time you play that guy, what will you change?”

Every result in your life depends on you.

There is a process of building that confidence.

4 tips

  1. Set goals. Very clear, short term, long term.
  2. You need extreme discipline. Cristiano Ronaldo, Incredible work ethic. He has the discipline and the work ethic
  3. Team. The people you surround yourself with.
    1. You are gonna think the same as people around you
    2. If the people around you are champions, they are gonna lift you up with great mindset. If they have negative mindset, they will put you down
  4. Self confidence
    1. When you are confident, you will set high goals and take great risks because you will believe you will make it
    2. People around you can give you confidence or take away your confidence
      1. They must believe in you even more than you
      2. They support you 
      3. They don’t point out mistakes just to embarrass you
      4. Some people will look at you as “he is great because he is fantastic for that, good at that” … some people will look at you and say “you are weak here, you have flaws here” … that’s true too but these are just 2 ways to look at the same person
        1. If somebody looks at you as glass half-empty, they will destroy you. 
        2. You know who LOOKS UP TO YOU … and you know who looks DOWN TO YOU. 
        3. Your supporters will give you so much confidence and help you go a long way

The difference between a CHAMPION and OTHER PEOPLE is in your head. Your mind.

  • You win a grand slam final with your mind. Not your tennis. Your tennis just follows your mind.
  • You need to think like a champion. 
  • When someone is in trouble, that’s when you know somebody is a champion.
    • Patrick tests the players in tough situations to see who they are.
    • Then sees their body language, the self-talk they use, how they talk to themselves.
  • Medvedev wins because of his incredible mentality
  • Djokovic before his match against Nadal
    • You could see from his body language that he was a champion
      • That he was gonna kill Nadal
      • And Patrick knew Djokovic was going to win.

A brain’s capacity for pain and creativity

What gives humans superpowers like creative artistic superpowers whether it’s somebody like vincent van gogh or robin williams … is the brain’s capacity for extraordinary thought. 

In that brain is the capacity for things to go wrong and awry. A bug perhaps. A chance for everything to come cascading down and crash IF You are not able to overcome the darkness that could be faulty in such systems. More complicated a neural system is, more it’s open to faulty interpretations, a misalignment, making mistakes.

A complicated neural network is perhaps not better than a basic neural network using a simpler model (say, like linear regression) and often makes mistakes that a simpler model would never have made, because it’s highly complicated and makes assumptions and calculations that are superfluous, resulting in unnecessary fatigue, mistakes, faulty models, faulty expectations, exaggerated assumptions, etc.

The causes might be multiple but a complicated neural network is more able to make SENSE of things and make comparisons and analogies and connections. But in the attempt to do so, it also makes vast generalizations especially in its early stages of growth and emotional maturity. Meaning without experience, these vast generalizations and connections would be inaccurate and perhaps highly faulty. That brain makes mountains out of molehills. You are overcome by the nature of stressful events and emotions, while trying to make sense of it, it will overwhelm you, stay with you forever, and haunt you in a degree much higher than to a normal human being. Perhaps it would mean that you feel pain more acutely, even more acutely. You feel grief. You feel anger, perhaps even emotions like envy in a much more powerful way than the basic neural network. 

So, this special, complicated, hyper-sensitive brain capable of extraordinary thought is highly capable of making errors in judgment. A simple mind has no other real motive in life other than eating, feeding, mating, playing and dying. Like a basic kitten. But a highly sensitive, complicated mind of a human being, a human spirit. With all its capabilities and superpowers and abilities you are also more vulnerable to pain, trauma, grief, loss, and emotional turmoil.  

일찍 포기하지 말아라

바둑은 자기성찰을 도와주는 아주 신기한 게임인 것 같다. 다른 비디오 게임이라던지 보드게임은 자기성찰이나 무언가 큰 교훈을 주기 보다 그냥 재미있기만 한데 바둑은 무언가가 다르다.

나는 왠지 모르게 일찍 바둑에서 포기하는 버릇이 있다. 이기고 있는대도 말이다. 이기고 있었다 (아주 미세한 차이로). 근데 도중에 몇 번 실수해 돌을 잃었다고 ‘아, 나 졌구나. 나 졌구나. 그냥 포기해야 겠구나.’ 계속 그런 생각만 하고 짜증내고 자신감을 잃어버리고 있었다. 진짜 인생 안에서도 그렇다. 잘 하고 있는데 자신감을 쉽게 잃는 타입이 아닐까. 긴 인생안에 실수, 실패, 오점 … 있는것이 당연하다.

그래도 그냥 끝까지 하기로 했다. 몇 점으로 졌는지 궁금했다. 근데 짜잔. 내가 한 2-3 돌로 이겼다.

나는 바둑판의 전체를 보는 능력이 아직 부족하고 이기고 있는지 지고 있는지 이해하는 능력도 불완벽하다. 그것이 오히려 희망이다.

나는 포기하고 있었다. 오랫동안. 하지만 포기하면 안된다. 일찍 포기하면 안된다. 끝까지 승부를 해야한다 ^^ 그냥 호기심으로 라도. 그럼 결국에 내가 이겨버리는 기적이 일어날 수도 있다. ‘그냥 여기서 포기해야 겠다’ 는 나의 심리는 나의 미숙한 심리였던 것이다.

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그러려면 편하게 앉아있으면 안되지.